Barb's Blog

When women divorce and are looking for divorce support, and later wondering about life after divorce, one of the most valuable things we can do is to take time, now and then, to sit quietly and simply "be."

Sometimes it can help if we sit with a cup of tea, or a bowl of ice cream, or a pad of paper and a pen to journal any thoughts or feelings that may come along.

Recently I had an image of myself sitting alone by a campfire on a beautiful star-filled night.  Next to me was the heavy backpack I'd been carrying for so long.  I kept it with me always, and the times it became too heavy for me to carry - or I became too weak - I would drag it along.

I have much further to travel in my life, and I'm exhausted.  If I'm ever going to move from this place, I need to examine the contents  of this backpack and decide what to leave here by the fire, and what precious things I want to continue to keep with me.

I honor my history and bless it, so I will not discard my history.  But I have decided I will discard the derogatory commentary and the judgment about it that hold me back and weigh me down and drain all my energy.

We each have the power to do this.  And when we do, our history will not be something heavy that we carry on our shoulders.  Instead, our history will flow around us like a brilliant cloak.  It will support every step we take like a great, strong pair of hiking boots.  It will whisper in our ear and guide us along our path.

How does this happen - this sorting out of our lives?  I'm not sure, but I do know how it begins.

It begins when we can sit quietly and simply "be."